Beautifully Complicated Romance

I’m greedily gulping down more Anita Blake after a short respite from reading. I can barely stop myself from skipping lines because I can’t read fast enough. I’m hungry for this story.

No other series grips me this way. I don’t ever seem to get as tangled up with fictional characters as I do with the ones in Anita’s world. I don’t feel as seen nor as utterly frustrated by any other cast. Cerulean Sins is definitely a favorite for me. The romance is filled with actual messy love that doesn’t always buckle under pressure, but often grows.

There’s Jean Claude. Who doesn’t love Jean Claude? He’s beautiful, strong, intelligent, observant, emotionally aware, and challenges people in ways that help. He’s the anchor for everything. Without him, Anita wouldn’t be the force she becomes. The most delicious slow burn romance I know of.

Micah is my next favorite. His endless acceptance is both a warm balm, and an irritating quality. He’s the least complicated addition to Anita’s life and the ease he brings her allows her to open up and explore things she couldn’t if she was always worried about him. The strength he gives her is beautiful.

Then there’s Jason. Here I get a bit of a flip. I relate to his attitude so much more than Anita’s in a lot of ways. He reminds me of who I was before I met my husband. A short span of my life that feels longer when I think about it. I love their friendship. The way they can be with each other. Both of them grow up so much. Part of it the natural course of life, part of it because of each other. Jason can talk to Anita in a way no one else can. He reminds me of friendships I have/have had.

Asher is an interesting addition. The desire to see him slide right in and feel he’s found home is palpable. As is the frustration with him in getting in his own way. Which circles back to Anita, who often gets in her own way as well. A perfect pairing. A frustrating combination.

Maybe it’s because I started reading this series at 19. Maybe it’s because I grew up trying to make my way as a petite female in many male dominated spaces. Maybe it’s just that phase in my life where I’m feeling really nostalgic and this hits the spot, but rereading these books makes me feel like I’m wrapped up in the coziest of comforters and I love every crazy and mundane moment of it all.

This is the kind of diehard romantic I am. The messy, trauma healing, personal growth, challenging, honest kind. With the many partners, it allows for a complexity not possible in a monogamous romance. I think it also makes it really easy to have emotionally present men. I have learned so much about myself reading these.

Cerulean Sins is definitely a favorite. I absolutely stayed up reading until 2am because there was no going to sleep without the comfy wrap up at the end. After all the intensity, it is some of the best closure for a series.