I’m going to do it. I’m going to get back on track and start doing the things I need to do to take care of myself so I can be here, fully, for my crazy family. My body has been begging for so long it has entered into an aggressive strike against my ‘hibernate until it’s over’ method of choice. I’ve lost touch with my personal power and have not felt goddess-like in quite some time now.
The strike began when I decided to have a big bowl of ice cream and suffer the consequences. The next day was spent lying around in agony which caused some back muscles to seize up, and now I can’t seem to shake this back pain at all. I know why it hurts. My hips are twisted and bent, my shoulders hunched and tight, my neck is shriveling into my collarbone, and my abs are being devoured by my pelvis. I have been clinging to my struggles so hard, that I have forgotten (once again) how to even breathe. Then I had ice cream and everything that has been holding me together threw their hands up and said “fuck it. Fine. Be a miserable wench!”
So after helping others feel better through massage, and working through my own pain while taking Advil, then running around to take care of our daughter’s probation stuff, and her therapy appointments, and errands, and… I think you get the idea, I have decided to start my routine again. It’s the only way I feel good regularly and the only way I can manage my life.
OCD to the rescue! I bought a bunch of these accordion folders before returning to work in order to organize my workouts and recipes to make my life easier when I would be busier. One of my better ideas, if I do say so. Everything is sorted into its own section, easily found. I’m pairing some yoga and exercises in the morning with a yoga routine in the evening. And I am determined to stop being in pain.
I’m going to try to keep up with posting my efforts here. I know a lot of us have fallen out of good habits and into bad ones in order to cope with the craziness of these Covid times. Our lives had to adjust in drastic ways. Even if we were able to keep it together through the first several months (that was me. First several months were a breeze. Comparatively speaking), we are all growing weary under the weight of it. So, here we go! My millionth time starting healthy habits again. I’m excited.