Weird Dreams

I had this dream the other night. I was at a house warming party for a friend’s new apartment. Very low key affair, but the place was large and beautiful. The strangest part here is that I was enjoying the social gathering.

I then decided I wanted to check out my soon-to-be new apartment on the floor below. So my friend, and host, decided to come with me. I was glad for the company. I unlocked the door and we walked in to an entirely different space. It was almost like a time capsule.

There were remnants of the previous tenant throughout the place. I remember thinking what a downgrade this was from my friend’s apartment, but I was happy with it. Bare structures and haphazard items decorated the place.

Then there was this cat. It was part of the deal with getting the apartment. I had tried explaining that I’m allergic, but the landlord didn’t care. I had to keep the cat. I decided to try and make friends with it.

So I caught this orange tabby with a towel and was really easy. Then it was a white kitten and got really vicious and attacked me while I was trying to cuddle it, but couldn’t hurt me. I can still feel the little teeth biting into my fingers. I decided to let it go. It came out of the towel fire colored with a black head.

Basically taking pain meds and falling asleep to Murdoch Mysteries makes for some wild dreams. At least the offending teeth in my jaw have been removed and I’m feeling much better now.

Taking a Break to Solve a Different Problem

This black and mushroom sweater has got me really worked up. I know what I need to do to make the collar right, but I’m not ready yet. So, instead I’ve decided to work on something else that has been driving me crazy for a few years.

I started this sweater so long ago I don’t even remember how long ago anymore. Every once in a while I’ve taken it out and tried working on it, but it always went sideways.

It was my first attempt at a sweater, back when crochet was my main craft. I thought crocheting one would be faster and simpler than knitting one. I was kind of wrong.

I thought this was an easy pattern, and maybe that is the whole issue. Often easy is more difficult for me. Needless to say, this garment has sat in a bag sleeveless and collar-less for a long time. It took me several years before I sewed the front and back together. Makes perfect sense that I would try to tackle it while avoiding my current frustration.

I did try to crochet the sleeves one more time, but the stitch pattern makes me crazy, so I went with a previous idea of knitting them. I also tried it on and found it too snug for me, so definitely too snug for my husband-whom I originally intended it for. My middle daughter has claimed it, hence the purple.

I’m hoping this project will help calm me and renew my spirit. I’d rather work on my sister’s gift with more joy than anger. So far, I’m finding it very relaxing.

High School Reunion

Scrolling through Facebook I came across a post from my high school class page. The plans for our 20 year reunion are in the works. I sent along my email address for more details as they are made. I’m surprisingly shocked.

I went to a large school where most kids had known each other since elementary/middle school. I had moved there for eighth grade and was still basically the new kid the entire five years I was there. I don’t really know the people organizing this reunion, but we have friends in common.

This led me to pull out my senior year book. The things I had forgotten. The antics I was known for. The clubs and groups I dropped out of because I needed a job, or to unburden my stress level as I learned about my anxiety disorder and its cohorts. The friends I lost, the ones I gained. My great big plans for college (I did a year and a half). I was pretty wild, yet rather mild.

Looking through the messages scribbled onto the pages I was struck by what my teachers had to say. Their encouragement of my creativity and fight. Their appreciation of my potential. It is exactly what I needed to remember right now.

These teachers had seen me survive a lot of difficult situations. My English/Literature teachers read my papers and class journals. I was able to be honest and vulnerable in them because I trusted them and they respected that.

My art teacher unlocked an ability in me that I thought wasn’t possible. He taught me how to look at things like a visual artist would. He encouraged me to follow my own vision and let me have free range. I’ll never forget him laughing every time I got to play with charcoal or pastels. I was a mess every time.

Both my art and German language teachers had my siblings as students too. They had a unique view into our family even though we never had classes together. My German teacher was one of the most forgiving, but also called me out. She kept me straight and I will always appreciate her caring.

My history and science teachers appreciated my enthusiasm and never shied away from my questions and challenging perspectives. Math teachers and I are a story for another day. I get it now, though. Totally different brains.

I think I’m saying I’d rather just see all (ok several of) my teachers. There are definitely some friends I still have and some people it would be nice to catch up with after 20 years. It’s a nice excuse to finally see some familiar faces from my past. When you have kids (at least for me with my three), visiting distant pals isn’t as easy as it was before.

And some of those encouraging sentiments from my teachers were echoed in what my friends and classmates wrote. I kind of forgot the good stuff from my senior year. It’s been so long since I’ve even really thought about that part of my history.

But wow. Twenty years. If anything else I appreciate this trip down memory lane. The perspective time and growth can give you is truly beautiful. I would never go back, but I am grateful for how those years shaped me and the people that were there along the way. We’ll see what happens.

Ugh!

I could just scream. This collar is really trying my patience. It would probably help to actually look for a proper pattern, but I’m really stubborn. I’ll figure it out.

The shape came out weird, but up through the button bands is fine, so I only had to rip back half the collar. I really need to just put it on some waste yarn every few rows to check it. While it’s on the needles it’s impossible to tell if it’s working.

I’m really grumpy about it and really want to be knitting, but this sweater is just turning me sour. Attempt number three, here we go. (Insert your favorite string of profanity here).

Stuffed Trio

They’re done! I’m rather delighted with the results. That damn owl, though. She really tested my perseverance. But I did it!

The badger was probably my favorite to make. I did flub a bit on the face and I didn’t give him any eyes, but I kind of prefer him that way. He has cloves mixed with the stuffing and smells delightful.

I feel like the clementine peels and ginger root were a better choice than vanilla beans. The scent works really well with the cinnamon in the fox and the cloves in the badger.

Some close ups of the fox too. He was fun. Gave me some confidence to make the others. We’ll see if I ever go online to get the other patterns.

Back to This Sweater

This picture was taken the day before I ripped all the black off and tried again. The shawl bit was too short and I had already castoff when I was able to see it. I’ve never done a shawl collar before, so I guess this was just the practice round.

Being the stubborn person I am, I wanted to figure out how to do this on my own. So I looked at lots of pictures and set to it. I think I’ve got the hang of it now.

This is my progress so far and I’m feeling pretty confident I’ve figured it out. I’m going a bit slower because I’m really tired of making mistakes. As it is, I’ve had to tink back a few times already when I forgot to cable. Yes, I’m adding a bit of cable to the ribbing.

Next up, pockets!

Plans Change

Originally I wanted to use vanilla beans for my third little critter. I knew they were expensive, but I didn’t realize how expensive. If it was for food, I may have just bought them, but for a knit toy-nope. On to the next idea.

So clementine peels and ginger root it is. I’m working with what I’ve got. I have never dried anything. Not intentionally, anyway. This combo should go well with the cinnamon fox and the clove badger I made.

Next up is an owl, which has decided to remind me why I don’t like making stuffed creatures. All the tiny pieces to be made and then sewn together. Ugh!

Ok. Back to making these itty bitty pieces. The orange and ginger is almost ready.

I’m in so much pain right now. This tooth has been a problem for way too long. It’s coming out in about a week. But seriously, this sucks.

I’m terrible with tooth pain. I’ve had some really traumatic experiences with dentists and orthodontists. I’ve been a mouth breather for most of my life due to allergies and sinus issues. And I’ve been blessed with some terrible genetics when it comes to teeth.

I’ll call the dentist in the morning for antibiotics. This one only gives me mild anxiety, and that’s mostly what’s left from previous experiences. This one has been so fantastic with my kids that I was finally able to start getting work done again.

Thankfully I’ll be able to be put to sleep for this and it just so happens I have an extra day off of work afterward.

Right now I’m just hoping to get enough sleep to be able to work in the morning. I’ve just had a week off and would rather work through the pain than call off. With enough sleep, I should be fine through my massages.

So here I go getting comfortable on the couch so I can sleep sitting up. Here’s to hoping my painkillers last through the night.

That Was Fun

Knitting this up was a lot more relaxing than I expected. The pattern is very straightforward and easy to follow. For the moment, I’m changing my mind on knitting stuffed critters.

My mom was thinking of getting potpourri sachets for the creatures my daughter makes. It gave me the idea to put broken up cinnamon sticks in this fox. I put them in every piece; mixing them in with the stuffing. I think it may even have helped with the leg shape.

I love the little tail and scarf. Especially since the scarf helps hide the stitches holding the head on. I may have overstuffed it a bit, but it feels nice to hold.

This Feels Familiar

All that’s left now is the collar, button bands, and pockets. However, this is all the yarn I have left. I went to the same store and it’s all gone. I looked online and it doesn’t exist. I’ve been here before.

My purple cable sweater sat for a year waiting for collar, button bands, sleeve cuffs, and pockets while I looked for more yarn. I finally went with a complimentary shade of grey-purple that actually gave the sweater more appeal. I wound up being happier with the sweater because of it.

While looking for more mushroom colored yarn, I bought an off white and grey that I hoped would work. The off white was terrible, but I did find this taupe at home. I sent this to my sister to ask what she thought. She suggested black. I happened to have a good amount of black leftover from the sweater I crocheted for work.

Initially I didn’t like it, but my sister really pulls off black and white and it is her main color scheme. The more I thought about it, the more I liked it. So, black it is.

I also found a magazine with this knit kit in it and decided that it might be fun. I don’t like making stuffed animals. I’m not a fan of tiny knitting, but something in me just had to get it. So I did. I’m using it to get a break from the sweater. I’ve been so focused and dedicated to it these past couple weeks. I’ve been making so many mindless mistakes and ticked back on so many rows. I really needed a palette cleanser. It’s kind of fun so far.